Almost Parent Time

from by Carrie Dahlby

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    The 3rd studio album by Carrie Dahlby is chock full of songs she's posted at the Funny Music Project website (TheFuMP.com) from 2009 to 2014. The album features appearances and/or collaborations by the great Luke Ski, Devo Spice, Flat 29, Earl 'Wyngarde' Luckes, Cirque du So What?, TV's Kyle, Power Salad, Worm Quartet, and introducing her son, Alex. With Dr. Demento Show hits like "Twitter Tweetin'", "Pregnancy Is Strange", and "Almost Parent Time", "Sing All Funny Jokes" is the best Carrie Dahlby album released in the past 5 years.

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about

Wyngarde of the late great "The Nick Atoms" comedy band joins Carrie for a duet of comic parental proportions. John Mapes of Possible Oscar guest stars, playing a guy who doesn't have a son. (Intro banter idea by Luke Ski.) Music by Bob Emmet of Project Sisyphus. This song premiered at Marscon 2014, where Kenny Rogers stepped in on Wyngarde's behalf.

lyrics

“Almost Parent Time” by Carrie Dahlby, featuring Wyngarde

[John and Earl vamp for 30 seconds “Have you seen the new Agents of SHIELD?” etc]

Carrie: I thought grown up time just was not for Moms.
'Cause once my child would snooze,
The time for fun was gone. (All gone.)

Earl: I feared my kid would never fall asleep.
No time for grown-up stuff

Both: But wait! His eyes are shut!
I’m fin’ly gonna get to goof off soon!

Both: Oh, almost parent time
Time for booze and salty food.
Almost parent time.
Watch violence and nud---ity
GTA and Minecraft and Skyrim time.
Parent time.

Earl: I love my child more than life itself
But I'd almost given up
On those DVDs on my shelves

Carrie: And all these games I saved for the next blue moon.
And I wanna watch my shows.

Both: My kid’s starting to doze!
Call the D.M., this is not a drill

Both: Oh, almost parent time.
Got RPG’ers at my door.
Got a pair o’ dice.
Chips and Mountain Dew and more
I swear those magic missiles will be so sublime
Parent time.

Carrie: My child’s snoring time is almost here in sight
No more “Goodnight Moon…”

Both: GOODNIGHT MOON EVERY NIGHT.

Both: Almost parent time.
He’s lying down his sleepy head.
Almost parent time
Cue up “The Walking Dead”
I’ll dust the cobwebs off my no no toys tonight
Parent time. Parent time. Parent time.
[John and Earl vamp for 20 seconds or so over the “Parent time, parent time, parent time” end part]

credits

from Sing All Funny Jokes, track released March 18, 2014
Almost Parent Time - featuring Wyngarde
A parody of “Almost Paradise” as performed by Mike Reno and Ann Wilson. Music and mastering by Bob Emmet. Additional cameo appearance by John Mapes (www.johnmapes.com). Intro banter idea submitted by the great Luke Ski.

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about

Carrie Dahlby Chicago, Illinois

Carrie Dahlby made her first contributions to the world of comedy music on the albums of 'the great Luke Ski'. Later she made appearances in the songs of Sudden Death, Possible Oscar, and many more acts from TheFuMP.com. Her debut funny music CD "Happy Ranch" was released in 2007, her 2nd CD "Giant Kitten" was released in 2009, and her 3rd and latest CD "Sing All Funny Jokes" was released in 2014. ... more

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